We’re talking about From the North, an examination of all sorts of fascinating UK TV bits by Keith Telly Topping.
Make that an “eccentric examination.” This blog is so wonderfully personal that it makes our head spin. Take this recent paragraph about DOCTOR WHO, for example:
Yer actual Peter Capaldi his very self surprised attendees of a BBC Worldwide event on Monday, when he turned up on stage in his recently unveiled Doctor Who costume. The actor emerged from the TARDIS (not the real one, obviously, because that would have been against all the laws of God and man) and spoke, briefly, with presenter Graham Norton at the annual showcase taking place in Liverpool. The twelfth-that’s-really-fourteenth incarnation of The Doctor sports a dark blue Crombie coat with red lining, dark blue trousers, a white shirt and black Doctor Martens boots. Of the outfit – created by costume designer Howard Burden – Peter said: ‘He’s woven the future from the cloth of the past. Simple, stark, and back to basics. No frills, no scarf, no messing, just one hundred per cent Rebel Time Lord.’
And this actual bit about Michael Kitchen, star of FOYLE’S WAR, which has become our Beloved Leader LB’s favorite police procedural:
Yet again, dear blog reader, the TV comedy line of the week came from the great Michael Kitchen – proving to be The King of delivering a pithy one-liner – in the final episode of The Life Of Rock With Brian Pern on Monday evening. In the end, it was hard to chose between: ‘That bloke from Blur makes cheese. In Guantanemo Bay they stuff cheese up the prisoners’ noses and play Blur songs at them all day to break their spirit and get them to talk. With remarkable success, I hear!’ And: ‘From a record company point of view death isn’t always a bad thing. They love a death. I mean, The Doors wouldn’t have sold nearly as many records if Jim Morrison had stayed alive. He’d probably be a judge on American Idol now. With his own range of pasta sauces!’
This observation is munchman’s fave:
Bookmakers have reportedly slashed the odds on risible, irksome odious oily twat Piers Morgan taking part in the summer series of Celebrity Big Brotherafter he was – very amusingly – sacked by CNN on Monday. Morgan’s red-faced embarrassment at having his American chat show dropped because of free-falling ratings can’t have been helped by news from Ladbrokes that it has started taking bets on him participating in the Channel Five reality show. Meanwhile, given his long-standing feud with Morgan, it’s no surprise that yer man Jezza Clarkson – who once punched the then Daily Mirra editor reet hard, in the mush, for which, frankly, he should have received a medal – had something to say about Morgan’s show being cancelled by CNN. However, theTop Gear presenter’s first tweet on Monday morning was unusually restrained given the circumstances: ‘I’m feeling strangely contented this morning. I wonder if something wonderful has happened somewhere.’ It didn’t take Jezza long to get into full flow, however – an hour later he tweeted: ‘I understand that Nigerian TV is looking for a new chat show host. Anyone got any suggestions?’ This was quickly followed by ‘Morgan has told us for years that his ratings are sky high. So obv[iously] he wasn’t sacked for that reason. Why else could it be, I wonder?’
And we mustn’t forget this disclaimer, happily viewable on every page:
This blog contains (occasional) outbursts of adult language and some (very minor) adult themes every now and then. So, if you’re not seventeen years old yet, dear blog reader, then please do yer actual Keith Telly Topping a favour. Naff off and come back when you’re a bit older. Thanks muchly.
For more freeform and extremely thoughtful showbiz observations run, do not walk HERE.