LB: Screener Report – 3

Abe Lincoln Vampire Hater

Nope, the image above isn’t from Spielberg’s acclaimed LINCOLN. It’s from ABRAHAM LINCOLN VAMPIRE HUNTER, a much more honest and appealing film.

Time now for the third and final installment of my mini-reviews of the screeners I’ve received from Oscar, DGA, and WGA award contenders.

The first time around, I reported on 5 films. The second time, I gave my opinion of 4. Now – well, now I’m so thoroughly disgusted with the films various studios are touting as the best of 2012 that all I can talk about is 1.

Yep, 1. Pathetic, isn’t it? A true testament to crappy film making. Or, maybe, to my intolerance and short attention span. You be the judge.


    Gwen the Beautiful and I saved Spielberg’s highly acclaimed extravaganza for New Year’s Eve. Our plan was to stay home and welcome 2013 by being thrilled and delighted during the night. (And hie ourselves to the best restaurant in town on New Year’s Day for its annual New Year’s Pajama Brunch. Oh, God, we’re old.) Unfortunately, we found ourselves totally disappointed by the film. Gwen was through with it after 11 minutes, staying with me on the couch but reading a book on her Kindle Fire. I watched the whole thing – fast forwarding most of the way. Don’t get me wrong. LINCOLN looked beautiful. The most perfectly composed film I’ve seen in a few years. But it’s not a movie, gang. It’s a historical pageant, pompous, self-satisfied, and formal. A celebration of one man’s fight to resolve an issue every viewer is familiar with (the Emancipation Proclamation…duh).  There’s no insight into the characters, no emotional linkage. Just actors pretending to be historical figures taking their turn on history’s stage, no more original than an expensive “pajama brunch.” And at least we could eat the damn brunch.

Ah well. I guess I expected too much. The minute I heard that Daniel Day-Lewis was demonstrating his greatness and dedication by texting in character I should have realized that no one recommending this static tapestry-disguised-as-filmed-entertainment had a clue about what great acting is.

Someone find me a truly good film! Recommend it in the Comments, or e-mail me. Something!




About LB

Larry Brody has been profiled in such national magazines and websites as Esquire, Entertainment Weekly, Starlog, People, Electronic Media, IndieSlate, TechTV, io9, and of course TV Guide. A legendary figure in the television writing and production world, with a career going back to the late ’60s, Brody has written and produced literally thousands of hours of network and syndicated television. Brody has also been active in the TV animation world, writing, creating, consulting, and/or supervising the cult favorite STAR TREK animated TV series, the SILVER SURFER, SPAWN, SUPERMAN, SPIDERMAN, and SPIDER-MAN UNLIMITED animated series, and was showrunner of the French animated series, DIABOLIK, as well as part of the team that developed and wrote the live-action/cgi animation sci-fi series Ace Lightning for the BBC. Shows written or produced by Brody have won several awards including - yes, it's true - Emmys.

One thought on “LB: Screener Report – 3

  1. geraldsanford says:

    But even a so-called ‘SELL-OUT’ is ‘WRITING’! A boxer who takes a dive still gets in the ring, and takes a punch. True — he doesn’t have to do a “rewrite”, or meet afterwards with a so-called Producer. “What d’ya mean the star refuses to say that line?!” “Okay, no problem. I’ll change it. Didn’t like it much myself!” gs

Comments are closed.